Love-lust

He said he loved me

I wanted him to love me

Show me how he loved so conditionally

Gave up what was precious to me to not lose him

I chose him

After all, how precious was virginity for the one you loved?

He said he loved me

So we used my body as his daily fix

Sessions upon sessions he got his release

Every frustration that went through his mind during that day, month, week

And me seeking to feel loved by somebody, laid it all down for him

After all, how precious was my body when somebody finally noticed me?

He said he loved me

So I made him my centrality

Ride or die chick that was me

Never accepting the truth that the relationship was about my needs and his

He was always the first

Was not his wife but I willingly submitted to every one of his lust

He controlled my emotions

I depended on his love,

My own personal ecstasy, that what I called our love

Friends that didn’t really know us said he was no good for me

I knew they were just jealous because they didn’t have what we did

See he loved me

And to love him was to give him every part of me

To love him was to try and keep him with my body

To love him was to use lust to bury all my own insecurities

To love him was to do something to get something in return

To love him was to say my friends were all wrong

To love him was to convince myself my body was worth nothing at all

To love him was to accept that virginity means nothing no-more

To love him was to encourage his lust so he would show love

Heck, I wanted it; I wasn’t forced to do it

Yes I wanted him, so I did it to prove it

Many times lust disguises itself as love, rules in our relationships and we don’t know it

We miss it because we don’t even know love to identify it and realize lust is not it

To know love will mean to let go of our needs and see that love truly is

God, he’s love and without him love don’t exist

Until we come to know his love the love we know is selfish

Until we come to know his warmth the warmth we know is worthless

Lust sees what it wants and takes advantage

Love sees what the other person needs first

See love is not selfish

Its patient and kind

Love does not seek to get its own every time

Love does not delight in wrong, so there shouldn’t be a time

When love will tell you if you love me baby you should be willing to prove it with your body then

Love that is not conditional at all

Well one condition and that’s that I remain true to who I am that’s all

Love that have the patience to love me from my face down

Cause ‘loving’ a guy with your legs first hoping he’ll one day wake up and love you enough to look at your face don’t work

Now loving a guy from your face down, and hoping he’ll love you enough to know the person behind the face’s smile might take some time

But at least if he goes go before you get to the legs, you know he’d taken nothing from you but some emotions, some smiles and time

Holding on to the wisdom that the love you need cannot just be found only in a man will make you smile,

And holding onto the truth that your body is not just your own, but a temple designed to honor the lord by waiting till the right time in marriage comes, will keep you strong

Till then be strong and remember that sometimes the best way to say I love you to someone is to say NO, but if you have love-lust him already, sometimes the best way to say I love you, no matter how hard will be to say, lets hang on :)